Thursday, December 30, 2010

Ye ever Notice?.....

Why do all adventures and quest seem to be to some great old tower of some evil sorcerer, invincible overlord or terrible Dragons lair? Didnt any good people ever horde great treasure? Why not “Lair of the humorous Unicorn” or “ Mr. Fluffy’s tower of 1000 delights”?

I mean, for years I have played Pen and paper and computer scenario’s where our characters have plunged into truly horrible places, with hideous traps, fiendish creatures and of course... the diabolical boss at the end. How did the evil guys get the lock on Lairs and dungeons? One would think that some kindly old king would build himself some really cool crypt to fill with his accumulated items that he wished to take with him to the next world so he could continue his Glorious deeds... but no... make a saving throw... sorry your dead!

I would love to be challenged by such creatures as a giant grape Jelly or a Rice pudding... or better yet... you are beset by a dozen Gnomes who begin to fix all your armor and repair your shoes. Where the hell are all the good guy lairs??? You enter a well constructed hallway with fire extinguishers (well marked) placed every 20 feet ( next to the trash cans with the smiling pixie sign that says “thanks for keeping your dungeon clean”) suddenly 10 laughing weresquirels demand that you listen to their rendition of “gray skies are going to clear up”...or you must eat more cookies then Wenzlar the Cookie King of level 5.

I’m just venting... to many a night my make believe adventures have come to gruesome end in some mold covered, skull encrusted hallway as fountains of tainted chaos blood gurgled in the background... Im just wondering if there is a flip side to the coin.

1 comment:

aravan said...

No one would delve into the crypts of the good guys - that's called grave robbing and is a very sordid and creepy thing to be involved in. It's perfectly normal to do that kind of thing to someone no one ever liked.